Think You're Ready to Separate? Think Again—Here's What You're Missing

Let me tell you a quick story.

A while back, I had a woman walk into my office with a shopping bag full of random paperwork—bills, kids’ school notes, a receipt from Chemist Warehouse... and a lipstick. She plopped it on the table, looked at me, and said, “I think this is everything the lawyer needs?”

Bless her.

Now, this woman wasn’t lazy. She was drowning. Emotionally, mentally, and physically overloaded from trying to keep it together during a messy separation. Sound familiar?

That moment stuck with me—not because she was unprepared, but because no one had told her how to prepare.

So today, I want to talk about Secret #5 from my Empowered Separation framework: PREPARATION. And no, I’m not just talking about having a color-coded folder (though I do love a good label maker). This is about preparing your mind, your documents, and your game plan.

🧠 Emotional Readiness is a Game-Changer

Let’s start with the stuff no one sees.

You can be legally prepped to the eyeballs, but if you’re emotionally raw, every email from your ex feels like a dagger. Preparing emotionally means building your internal team—think therapist, coach, or just a brutally honest bestie who reminds you not to text him at midnight.

It’s about learning how to respond instead of react. Because family court? It doesn’t reward drama. It rewards calm, clear, strategic communication.

🗂️ Documents That Save You Dollars

Want to save money on legal fees? Do your homework.

I’m talking about:

• Key financial records (bank statements, tax returns, etc.)

• Parenting plans or communication logs

• Any existing court orders or agreements

If your lawyer has to dig for it or chase you up three times? That’s billable time. And trust me, that adds up fast.

I always say: the more prepared you are, the less time you’ll spend crying over your legal bill.

🎯 Set Your Goals (Yes, Even in a Messy Separation)

Here’s something most people don’t do—set goals for the process.

Do you want 50/50 care? The house? Minimal court involvement? Emotional peace? Preparing with clarity means you’re not just reacting to your ex’s moves—you’re playing your own game. And when you have a goal, every conversation with your lawyer (or your ex) gets easier.

💅 Court is Not the Place to “Wing It”

If your matter ends up in court or mediation, prep matters. You need to:

• Know your timeline

• Understand what’s being asked

• Stay composed under pressure

You don’t have to be perfect—you just need to be ready.

(And please, for the love of lattes, don’t bring the Chemist Warehouse bag.)

🎧 Want More? This Episode Breaks It Down.

If this blog hit a nerve or sparked a lightbulb, go listen to the full episode of The StacyM Show: Secret #5 – PREPARATION. We dive deeper into how this one habit can completely shift your experience of separation.

Or if you’re thinking, I just need someone to help me figure out what I don’t even know yet, book a free clarity call. No pressure, just some real talk with someone who’s been on both sides of the legal table.

👉 Click here to book your free clarity call.
👉 Listen to the full episode now.